Modern Manhood – A Four-Part Essay

Modern Manhood - A Four-Part Essay


1. A Historical Perspective on the Status Quo

Let’s look at the life of a single guy in Corporate America. He works half his waking hours, inches from a computer screen, isolated from women, making profits for the top five percent of the world’s wealthy while these choice elite tan their wrinkled fat on white, Caribbean beaches. During the week, this single guy buys things on credit and at interest which he doesn’t need. Now he must spend more of his time working and away from women to pay the interest on the things he doesn’t need.

At the end of the week, he manages to wrangle up one friend, since his friendships are largely weakened, and they go to a singles bar for the sole purpose of getting laid or finding a girlfriend. When they arrive at the singles bar, they find the girls all pretending to have a blast and that most of them don’t really need them for financial or physical security since their jobs and society have already fulfilled these needs.

To really put the proper perspective on this, it’s important to remember that in third-world countries and extant tribal villages it’s not considered acceptable for a grown man to go a week without sex. Sex to them is a life necessity tantamount to water. Therefore, if the single guy was to explain his strategy to a tribal man in Ecuador, it would go like this: 

“I spend half my waking hours for the first five days of the week tapping my fingers to give the tribal leaders wealth. The last two days are mine. During these, I search for women because I am very lonely and the leaders have not allowed me women all week. The leaders have set up a nice place for me to search for women. It’s so noisy that I can’t talk to the person standing eight inches from my mouth and our tribal rules dictate that while I search for women I must drink enough alcohol to potentially make myself sick for the rest of the weekend.”

This is what we call fun. Here, I’ll mention that I’m not saying this is a good plan, much less the only plan. I’m pointing out that, after losing friends from the natural completion of high school, college and moving from state-to-state to chase several jobs over the course of a career, the majority of young men and women employ this strategy, repeatedly.

And, in this situation, it is helpful to understand what forces have created it. In Freud’s essay, Civilization and Its Discontents, he stresses how the birth of monotheistic religions, rising out of city-states in collaboration with a much later industrial revolution have served to break social ties and generally deprive men and women of healthy expressions of their sexual natures.

To understand how to fix this problem, we must first understand what man really is. Man was designed to hunt large game in small tribes. There were many adaptations over previous hominids that made this possible but the adaptation most important and most overlooked is man’s ability to sweat over every inch of his body. The cooling system of a man is superior to any other animal on this planet and this illustrates that man was ‘designed’ to be employed and in motion.

Contrast this to the hordes of men who spend their weeks sitting still in cubes, only to stand in motionless, sullen clumps around a dance floor or bar at week’s end. Prehistoric men would use their advanced cooling systems to basically run large prey such as mammoths into heat exhaustion, thereby making these large food sources easier to kill. The women, children and elderly would then dissect these mammoths for food, clothing and tools. In this way, prehistoric men had a life-or-death role in the community. For a prehistoric man, SEDUCTION = SURVIVAL.

In other words, there were no pick-up lines. There was simply:  “I am the best hunter. You are the best mate. Let’s get it on.” The men largely ignored the women and concentrated on the matter of survival. The women actually benefited from this since these preoccupied and fully employed men were very easy to study and appraise for their mating potential.

In contrast, when a guy approaches a girl and tells her a funny story or even tells a group a funny story, he’s focusing all his attention on them and the outcome of their approval, thereby giving the women very little information to evaluate regarding his character. When the man tells the story to the women or group for their approval he knows that they are evaluating him and that their evaluation will determine his fate. There is something very subtle that happens to a person when they realize they’re being watched. It’s like when your mother turned on the family camcorder for the first time during a holiday and told you to act natural. It’s the Heisenberg Uncertainty principle: The electron cannot ‘know’ it’s being observed without that ‘knowledge’ affecting its state. A man should give people something worth observing while remaining unaware and indifferent to his being observed.

2. A Life’s Purpose

Being an entertainer alone is not a valuable purpose. If the sole purpose of his communication is entertainment, then every time he finishes a story or joke he must essentially start over again from scratch to gain their attention or interest. If a guy tells a number of funny stories he may be viewed as an ‘interesting’ guy but what does that mean? If reciprocity has not been established and they have not learned anything valuable about him, nothing has been gained and he is just a puppet that they may occasionally instruct, “say something interesting!”

But, if on the contrary, he can communicate that he is a man, he has gained an advantage over the disenfranchised masses known as guys. A man simply is on a path that does not waiver. It holds fast over the years. Being this type of male is interesting to people. They can share wisdom and advantages to this male which may benefit him in a predictable way, pushing him into a higher lever of status and given them a return on investment for favors owed. They can consider him as a tool that they may use to their advantage. If the man has observing-ego and understands politics, he may choose how he is used, by whom, and for what remuneration.

I’d like to suggest a new style of ‘pick-up’ which I will call ‘set-down.’  Imagine going to a bar with the purpose of networking with the men at that bar, the same way a prehistoric man might network between and among tribes. If a man were to act this way, if he were to, 1:  determine his unwavering purpose and path and, 2:  use his free time to advance along that purpose and path, he would be giving the women around him the best possible information with which to evaluate his worthiness as a man. Women are truth seeking machines and no matter how craftily we camouflage to mimic affluence and purpose, they gravitate toward the true wellsprings of these assets.

Affluence and purpose are both necessary to healthy manhood. The overall goal of a single man’s life is to maintain and increase his security by serving others. Affluence is security in itself but it’s not the truest security possible. The truest security comes from alliances with other people. If a man doesn’t have a purpose—that is, a path and an established system of reciprocity among his alliances—he’ll be deceived and steered off-course until everything has been taken from him.

How does one gain the wisdom to determine his life path while gaining the resources necessary to fuel this endeavor? To understand this, we must first analyze the instinctual drives of man. From the example of the prehistoric hunter, one can see that man was ‘designed’ to run and eat large quantities of flesh. Vegetarianism may be a healthier lifestyle but it’s only plausible in the wake of numerous agrarian and industrial inventions. For prehistoric humans, the only way to achieve the caloric needs of their unusually large and powerful brains was through predation.

For the illustration of this discussion, let’s pretend that since mammoth hunting was of the first known food sources of man, that it was the very first. Next, let’s examine the first slaughter of mammoths from the mammoth’s perspective. The mammoths had lived relatively peaceful lives for hundreds of thousands of years prior to the arrival of humans. Admittedly, they had to fend off attacks from predators but by working as a team, deaths from predation were fairly rare and largely excluded to the sick and elderly. These mammoths were able to give birth and, very gradually over the majority of their life, increase the size and strength of their bodies many times over through grazing and foraging. Suddenly, Man, bursts onto the scene; He tricks them and prods them in one direction and then the next.

Just when the mammoths believe themselves free of Man, He shows up inexplicably, defeating the mammoth so that, when these men are finished, they have appropriated the energy stores of the mammoth’s forty plus years of grazing and foraging within a few minutes of killing. There are things that set this kill apart from other struggles in nature. Man uses weaponry, skill, premeditation and trickery to take something—the spoils—which he did not earn. This is not natural predation—this is war. And inherent in war is motion. Man is an animal born of War and Motion. Ever since this birth he has felt guilty—sinful—as if he knows that his prowess has unfairly tipped the balances of nature to no good ends. The extinction of the mammoths along with the near extinction of the North American buffalo may be good examples of this sin or—borrowing from the Latin—distance from the natural goals of life. In reaction to this, Man has sought to distance himself from both War and Motion through the repression and stagnation of, first, religion and, then, industrial revolution. This has not helped man since War and Motion are his true essence and identity. To be a successful man, you must embrace War and Motion.

You have two choices of how you can have your War and Motion:  On the inside or on the outside. Obviously, it’s best to keep your War and Motion on the outside and to make your mind a sanctuary of peace and clarity. This is done through exercise.

You must use all your adaptations as they were designed. You must sweat heavily several times a week. One of the best ways to do this is to run, since the human body was ‘designed’ specifically to run upright so that it could carry weaponry and chase Big Game. And you must carry weaponry and chase Big Game. Modern day Big Game comes in the form of life ambitions—the purpose I spoke of earlier. If you go outside for a jog to lose a few pounds to look good in your bathing suit, you are doing it wrong. If you don’t break into a full sweat several times a week, you are doing it wrong. And by ‘it,’ I mean life. You should run in as much sunlight as possible and, while you run, you should open your mind up to your life’s goals. The Native Americans would crawl into sweat lodges to see visions to guide their tribes and, as you run (while using good judgment regarding you physical abilities), you will also have visions of how to lead your life.


1. The Role of the Father

In order to understand the divergence of man’s thoughts from their primal foundation, an accurate model of the mind needs to be envisioned. I imagine Freud’s psychoanalytic model of the mind as a sphere—(the sphere being a favored model of the self from thinkers ranging from Plato, to Aristotle, to Jung). At childbirth, the individual’s sphere is uniform and consists only of the id or the collection of the child’s needs and desires. As the child matures, it understands that it’s differentiated from others and how it’s different in temperament and personality to its siblings and playmates. As this happens, it grows a shell around its id which we call the ego. Now, for the id to interact with the world it must do so through the agent of the ego. Lastly, as the child begins to understand the concept of punishment from its parents, an invisible, ever-present parent appears in the form of the superego. This superego forms as an additional shell around the ego. Now, for the id to express itself and communicate with the outside world, it must do so by two agents. Communication from the outside world must first pass, oftentimes subconsciously, through the superego and next by the ego before it can reach the id. Likewise, desires and needs must navigate these two shells successfully to reach the outside world. Of these three components, Freud found the superego to be susceptible to taking on unwanted tendencies. Specifically, the superego or conscience of certain males can tend to over-regulate the libido.

In his clinical practice, Freud noticed that men with excessively lenient fathers had overdeveloped superegos in adulthood while men with excessively strict or abusive fathers had nearly no conscience at all. Freud theorized that only through battling with a father that seeks to limit a boy’s freedom could that boy truly see that father’s moral strengths and weaknesses. These strengths and weaknesses were then transferred to the boy’s superego so that his conscience could be fine-tuned with the relatively recent environmental experiences of his father. In the absence of this battle, the guilt of a boy’s Oedipus complex (the love for his mother and desire to kill and usurp his father) could build unchecked. In the moral skirmishes of a strict father, a boy is taught that people cannot expect to be perfect and that there are several pragmatic ways toward healthy sexual relationships with women.

2. The Industrialized Rite-of-Passage

It stands to reason that the man who achieves manhood soonest and fullest will also have the most plentiful and highest quality relationships with women. Throughout history, rites of passage have been developed for men to help them achieve this end. Contrary to this, there is not much talk of woman achieving womanhood. Here, I simply admit that I have no recollection of a conversation or anything in the media regarding women going to great extents to achieve womanhood. There is, however, talk of woman achieving womanhood through physical changes. These changes in young women are dramatic and transformative, much like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon. For boys, an increase in muscle mass, a broadening of the shoulders and a deepening of the voice all happen gradually. These male changes are not transformative. Further, society does not view these male changes with real respect or awe. A muscular, broad-shouldered teenage boy, who lives with his parents and studies for algebra tests, is not treated by adults any different from his prepubescent friends while a buxom teenage girl most certainly is and to the extent that every older man and woman in her presence can oftentimes feel the awkwardness in their stomachs and notice changes in their own behavior.

For these reasons, cultures throughout history have developed various rites of passages to help boys achieve their elusive manhoods. The United States, with its cultural ambivalence and frenzied, social mobility, lacks a rite of passage for boys. In the absence of this, young boys have sought to view their first sexual experiences as their rite of passage. Judging by my own experiences, however, I believe, 1:  it does not cause men to mature and, 2:  it’s neither necessary nor sufficient to achieving manhood. There is a hidden rite of passage in the United States and to understand it we must contrast the dangers of a highly civilized society such as ours with a tribal village. In a tribal village the dangers are almost exclusively from physical threats while in a civilized society the dangers are almost exclusively nonphysical. In the United States, the main concern of the father toward the son is that the son may fail to maintain or uplift the bloodline’s socioeconomic standing. In a tribal village the main concern is that the son may not maintain or uplift the bloodline’s physical safety.

In both cultures, these fathers enthrone themselves in the superegos of their sons but they do this in differing ways, resulting in differing superegos. The village father fills the boys head with warnings of how to stay safe. The teachings of civilized fathers are largely derivative of their own learning from an education system built to produce good factory workers:  don’t get out of line, be punctual, maintain your employment, learn the skills your superiors expect of you.

For the tribal father, the boy’s rite of passage is a simple matter of abandoning his son in the middle of the jungle to fend for himself. While fending for himself, the boy has the opportunity to test each of the teachings his father gave him and, by evaluating the information stored in his superego, the enthroned image of the father perched inside the boy’s head fades. With this image gone and the best of the father’s knowledge tested, father and son can see each other as equals; the boy can become a man.

In a civilized country, the father must again place the boy under duress. But, since there are no physical hardships, he must create psychological hardships. He must intentionally limit the boy’s freedom and test his patience. In so doing, the boy will rebel, repeatedly, and, in each rebellion, the boy will test each of the teachings placed in his superego by his father. Over a period of years, the boy, in his arguing with his father, will have thoroughly vetted all the thoughts in his superego. This is the civilized boy’s process of dethroning the image of his father perched in his superego. Again, in doing this, the civilized boy is able to view his father as an equal. In both the tribal and civilized rite-of-passage, the fathers have made their sons war for the knowledge of what information stored in their superegos was worth passing along to the next generation and what could be abandoned.

In the absence of a strict father, a boy’s superego may develop a variety of issues. He will likely overly-tune-in to believing how God would judge particular situations or he may substitute a woman such as a mother or sister as his father figure. In either case, the development of his superego will be overly ‘strict’ regarding moral issues concerning women.

To understand how the superego functions and develops, imagine that this outer shell from our earlier discussion is covered with a dense layering of people. These people are charged with examining, sorting, accepting and rejecting all information before it can journey inside the individual. When information comes to the individual, very often the same type of information comes to the same spot on the shell. Sometimes, information or situations come to an individual that cause him pain, danger or shame. In this event, since the information largely approaches the same place on the shell, those individuals are converted from mere citizens to soldiers. They are placed on guard and told to block this information or prevent this situation from reaching the id. In some cases, this is a good thing. If only a few citizens in a certain spot are converted to soldiers, then the information can be blocked while nearby citizens can take on the task of relaying the overall presence of the information to the id so that it can make adjustments or accept the information as it pleases. But, if too many citizens are converted to soldiers, it can have the effect of completely blocking certain aspects of a person’s reality. For many frustrated young men with invisible father’s enthroned, domineering female figures and religious guilt, the stress surrounding sex can convert so many soldiers that the only parts of a woman they can still see without shame are the parts that comforted them as infants—her breasts. This explains why the breast fetish is a peculiarity of the upper-middle-class, industrialized demographic.

Similarly, in Freudian phallic regression, these previously mentioned troop garrisons are said to block-out various sexual developmental stages so that the males become overly concerned with the effectiveness of their penises. In these men, the garrisons which have been set-up to block out stressors have only allowed these men to see women for their erogenous zones. Isn’t it ironic that this describes the modern pornography industry exactly and that, if we were to consult numerous experts, all would easily agree that ‘porn sex’ is far from expert or pleasurable sex. Male porn stars are not good lovers, they are compensating for their overactive superegos which have led to their phallic regressions. The multitudes of modern men drawn to pornographic sex are suffering from this same problem of an overactive superego. They are seeing the world with only their superego while letting only a sliver of the feminine reality penetrate into their ids. To be a man, one must uncloud his superego so he can ‘see’ clearly and distinctly in all directions with his id, or, to coin a phrase:  use his inner vision.

A man’s id is composed of all the nuances that make him unique—his strengths, his weaknesses. And in these strengths and weaknesses is the code for what would best compliment him in a mate. When the judgment of the superego is taken out of the equation, the id is free to communicate and grow with the outside world, organizing itself to determine what suites its needs.

This describes how a boy becomes a man in modern society but it does not explain the process in detail. The most critical process in the transformation of a boy’s superego is the reconciliation of the boy’s libido with the outer world.

3. The Male Libido, Anarchy, Existentialism

Man’s genius is a byproduct of his libido. Take away his libido and you take away his connection to the world and his creativity. The libidos of men, however, are troublesome, causing hardships, heartache and violence. In response to the negative consequences of a man’s libido, the state must seek to limit the man’s independence through its authority (similar to the father/son relationship described earlier).

A defense of modern man is a defense of his libido despite its negative impacts on the state. It’s a defense of a man’s ability to decide what is right within himself. In modern times, powerful societal forces have developed in the form of religious, corporate, academic and government entities all seeking to maintain the status quo from which they derive their power. The potential upheaval made possible by a man’s genius and desire is a threat to these institutions. Therefore, a defense of modern man is a defense of anarchy. And anarchy is the opposite of current societal norms.

Current attitudes about men derive from Judeo/Christian ethics which derive from the rise of Christianity which, ultimately, derive from Christianity’s growth out of the impending fall of the Roman Empire. This time of tumultuous upheaval was marked by one male, despotic ruler quickly being assassinated and replaced by another. In response to the carnage caused by the male libido in these times, the Christian doctrines of extreme libidinal prohibitions were developed. Fast forward two-thousand years to the United States:  the geographic environment, the family unit, the economic systems and the available technologies have all drastically changed. Existential philosophers have bemoaned the futility of trying to establish man’s preconceived nature and, further, to establish a singular set of rules in one epoch that can be true for all times:

If every man that ever existed or that ever will exist is, was and will be nothing more than a soldier sent to different environments to fight different battles, does it make sense that each of these soldiers should be sent in with the same battle plans?

4. The Necessity of Moral Relativity

The idea that only Good can produce Good must be rejected. Social Conflict theory states that in an environment of limited resources, one group must suffer so that another can prosper. Utopian societies have been dreamed and failed. Mankind cannot exist in a state of perfect, perpetual balance because a state of perfect, perpetual balance is by definition stagnant.

Men go off to war and kill other men so that we can keep the advantages we enjoy. To deny the existence of moral relativity is to deny that the act of killing another in battle can be both good for the victor’s kin and, simultaneously, bad for the kin of the victim. Multiple, simultaneous truths exist in relative morality just as multiple, simultaneous velocities exist in Relativistic physics. Here, the argument may be put forward:  But we battle for what is right; we battle for the truth. That ‘truth’ does not exist; it’s a castle in the sky. You battle for resources and every human being has an equal right for resources. In this way, moral relativity is established. In this way, men use the Bad to create the Good. It’s not spoken of much; it’s felt more than expressed because the presence of moral relativity is at once troublesome, frightening and complex. And, for a man, this transformation of the Bad into the Good is a necessary tool from which he is reliant for his strength:  the beheading of a chicken so his family can eat, the crushing of a spider so his wife can sleep, the rudeness towards a waiter so his family can finally get some service. It allows him, on many levels, to do the nasty stuff no one likes to look at or acknowledge but which are nonetheless essential for rebirth and prosperity.


 1. The Role of Emotion

It’s evident that loving relationships can’t be created or maintained in a vacuum. They depend on a tribe for both their spark and maintenance. This tribe can, in modern society, be thought of as a mastermind to develop your life’s purpose. But how does one develop a mastermind? It’s been proposed that Man is an animal born of war and motion, that argument with a father is the key to a modern boy’s maturity, that a life’s purpose is essential to attracting women and that men attract women by leveraging the power of a tribe. In light of these propositions, how can a man be more effective in the world? What is the one, greatest error of modern man’s thinking that has stifled his growth? A modern man looks around and sees trains stretching over continents. He sees airplanes crossing the sky and carries a computer in the palm of his hand. It’s easy for him to dismissively say, “Logic created all these things. Logic is the supreme achievement of modern life. Logic is where a man’s thinking should always begin.” The greatest error of modern man is believing that logic should precede emotion in a man’s thoughts. Emotion is the selecting function of a man’s thoughts. Logic is the understanding function. Emotion tells us what is important and logic helps us understand those important things. If a man overly develops his logical capabilities while suppressing his emotions, this can lead him to spend his life contemplating things which are actually of little importance to him.

2. Competition between Men and Women

For most men, women are actually the greatest area of importance in their lives. Even if you build a perfect life with strong alliances and a clear purpose, however, there will still be friction between you and the women you desire. The more attractive and accomplished the woman in question is, the greater this friction—or, more precisely, this competition—will seem. This competition might seem foreign and misplaced. To understand this misplaced competition, we must understand and accept the natural progressions of civilizations. At the beginnings of a civilization, times are tough, and men are attentive to their wives and children since these are the greatest investments in their lineage. As civilizations reach their apex, with increases in safety from war and healthcare, men are drawn away from their families by the temptation of additional lineages from mistresses. This phenomenon has been made worse in modern times with websites and movies that can allow men fantasy mistresses.

The removal of the father’s attentiveness from the family unit causes serious long-term repercussions to sons and daughters raised in these families. As early as Machiavelli’s The Prince, writers have noticed how prosperous, civilized states produce effeminate men after long periods of peace. And this has always been a byproduct of prolonged peace and its impact on family dynamics.

To understand family dynamics, it’s helpful to look at Freudian thought in the light of recent evolutionary psychology writings. Evolutionary psychology looks to the sperm/egg dichotomy as a genesis of male/female differences. In this school of thought, a man is essentially his sperm. He is personified by his sperm as a woman is personified by her egg. The woman has a limited number of eggs, which provide nourishment for the sperm, as a woman may choose to provide nourishment for a man on a much larger scale. The egg is a nourishing asset unto itself without needing proof or reference from the outside world. Mathematically, it’s an a priori asset. The woman’s eggs are like the gold upon which a currency is valued. The sperm, in contrast, is an a posteriori asset. The man has a seemingly inexhaustible supply and, therefore, they derive value only through indirect references to the outside world. His sperm can be compared to stock certificates. It doesn’t matter how many times the shares split or how many you print if the company is not doing well in the world at large. From this, men and women can be further reduced by the compliment principle. Provided a man comes from a healthy, traditional family, if you could give him just one compliment, the compliment he would most appreciate is ‘capable.’ Likewise, if a woman comes from a healthy, traditional family, the one compliment she will most appreciate is ‘precious.’

Now, if you go around calling women you don’t know precious, you will get slapped almost as many times as you say it. One hundred years ago, however, calling a woman precious was a simple compliment that would barely raise an eyebrow. Now, it will more often than not be taken as a confusing insult. The reasons for this are twofold. For the first time in hundreds of thousands of years, women are being indoctrinated en mass into an educational system which was first envisioned with the goal of producing capable, male factory workers. To further compound this, through the process I mentioned earlier, fathers are withdrawing themselves from the family unit. This means that fathers, the first male teachers and the truest experts of a daughter’s preciousness, are not teaching their daughters how to view themselves as precious. In a healthy, traditional family, a mother communicates to the father that he is a capable man and, in turn, the father tells the mother she is a precious woman. The sons and daughters witness this at an early age and use this knowledge as a template for all future relationships with men and women. With the mental, emotional or physical absence of modern fathers, not only do sons lack adequate role models but women view their desire for preciousness as an unknown unknown. In other words, they don’t even know that they should desire to feel precious or to what extent they should be entitled to feel this way. In the absence of the father’s precious-signals they key into the mother’s capable-signals which appear to these daughters to always be disproportionately directed toward the males in their families. This only fuels their desires to be viewed as capable more and this energy is often directed into scholastic achievement. This achievement, however, is not satisfying to them because, unbeknownst to them, they really want to feel precious.

3. The Touch

People often concern themselves with what knowledge and values are being passed down in a lineage from father to son. They fear that the correct ideas aren’t being verbally passed down from one generation of males to the next. But, consider that some ninety-plus percent of our communication is believed to be nonverbal. Body language experts can view past election footage and tell you with certainty who won. In light of this, isn’t the loss of nonverbal knowledge between father and son much more alarming? Young men stand around, motionless, without knowing how to project their voices, how to stand and how to touch. This is what Shania Twain meant when she sung, “You got the look, but have you got the touch?” We are a nation of young men who have largely lost The Touch. To get it back, it seems natural that one must clear up their superego.

This can be accomplished on an individual basis by spending time in meditation over what values one holds, who put them there and whether they are worth retaining. Once the superego is cleared of unnecessary restrictions, the id can become accustomed to communicating directly with the outside world. In short, I believe Shania Twain’s The Touch refers to a man who is in touch with what he really wants. This is the polar opposite of the United State’s quintessential porn flick.

Regrettably, the American porn star, with his constrictive superego and compensating objectification of women, represents a poor-man’s facsimile of the classic alpha male, a plastic, factory-produced Napoleon. But, this pornstar-mentality is a response to what we’ve requested. In the States, there are two kinds of men, the aspiring alpha male and the alpha male. To succeed in all the ways we’ve been programmed to accept success, we must be a huge success because of the movie stars, TV shows and music videos we’ve watched, because of the need to value our lives against advancement over what our already prosperous parents had—because of the perfectionism that builds from the fear of a stepparent’s rejection. We feel we must overcome the disenfranchisement that arises from our lack of cultural identity and heritage. We feel we must yield to the prodding from enticements of social mobility. We feel we are destined to be plastic, mass produced alpha males or males embroiled in some crisis.

4. America’s “Alpha” Male

America’s insatiable desire for the alpha male necessitates that one must win the crowd. This is done by creating attraction from a woman by interacting with as many people in a particular situation as possible. This is counter to intuition. We grew up in modern homes where we modeled the romance and courtship of our parents as an activity that involves only two people. Throughout adolescence, our parents stressed to us how they needed some alone time and we grew accustomed to the idea that romance and attraction can somehow only happen when two people of opposite sex are in seclusion. This is definitely a Post-Agrarian, Post-Industrial, Post-WWII idea, unique to the United States and to the second part of the twentieth century onwards. Our society is in a state of rebirth back to its old conditions of tribal attractions. In our social environments, excellence means negotiating the challenges and pitfalls of dealing with as many difficult and annoying people while providing leadership.

And somehow, despite this need for excellence, we have lost our appreciation for the rituals of excellence. The polytheistic cultures had a god, a temple, a ritual for everything they needed:  Love, War, Business. They understood that there were things that existed like food, water and shelter and things that did not exist. They understood that the things that did not exist oftentimes had more value than the things that did exist. These nonexistent ‘things’ became their gods. They made rituals that were really just processes, refined over generations for the purpose of setting their minds to a task. Oftentimes, these rituals involved sacrifices of their food and this helped them pay attention to what was important to them. In modern times, people who don’t sacrifice don’t focus.

All of the above information might still not seem helpful if I can’t explain one haunting question:  What do women want? The answer is everything. Every human being wants everything, if they can have it. To make this more helpful, I’ll redefine this question:  What’s the one thing that women want that we don’t know they want? They want us to meet them on equal or higher footing. If you have the low ground in reference to a woman, you’ll seem invisible to her. The difficulty with this concept is that low and high grounds can oftentimes be exceptionally ‘mental’ occurrences.

Exceptionally beautiful women always seem bubbly and vapid to the men who desire them most. To understand this, we must understand the universe. The Second Law of Thermodynamics holds jurisdiction over almost everything in the universe. The Second Law states that all things move toward increasing ‘disorder.’ Things decay and die. But life is the singular thing in the universe that strives to move in opposition to this, toward order and flexibility. There is nothing more emanating of order and flexibility than exceptionally beautiful women. Because of this and their experiences of a world constantly catering to their whims, smiling at them and offering them their desires, these women are oftentimes exceptionally upbeat. The men who most desire these women live lives of completely different experiences. Opposites attract but, as a final insult, the arrow of attraction seems to be only capable of pointing from you to her. If you come at her from your mindset of scarcity and depression, not only will she not sympathize, she will not have the life experiences to view your experiences as valid. If you want a woman like this, focus on what you love about life when you’re in her presence. If you don’t come to a woman with equal or greater energy and life, you will literally be invisible to her. If your energy level is ten and hers is twenty, the only way to make her feel the same attraction that you feel for her is to be at thirty. And that’s not easy. That’s why a modern man needs the challenge and fulfillment of a life’s purpose. You must keep your war and motion on the outside through exercise to maintain the peace and clarity of your mind. From this position, you can seek to gain the order and flexibility you need to create alliances and, ultimately, attraction.

This raises the question: is attracting a woman all that’s really important in life? To answer this, we must first examine the question of what a woman wants with more scrutiny.

5. The Pickup …The Set-Down

The set-down of women as opposed to the pickup is the other half to the equation, it’s the balancing force that gives meaning, like the black and white of this page that allows one to read or the Ying to the Yang.

Starting as early as the Enlightenment, men have been fascinated with the powers of magnets, wires and mechanisms. Men of considerable intelligence and achievement such as the engineering genius, Nicoli Tesla, have devoted huge portions of their lives attempting to invent ‘generators’ that ‘create’ energy from nothing even though these devices are in clear violation of the previously mentioned Second Law of Thermodynamics. For hundreds of years, each time an inventor would propose a new Second Law violator to create energy out of nothing, men would flock from miles around only to be disappointed. Likewise, recently, men flock to new schools of thought regarding how to attract women, believing attraction can magically be created from nothing. Why have so many intelligent men been fooled for so long? The Second Law is a law of balance, of equitable giving and taking. Owing to the warlike, imbalanced genesis of men described earlier, the minds of many men have a blind spot for this law.

Imagine a piston in a car’s engine which has air pushing both of its sides. If the air on both sides of the piston is the same pressure, the piston can’t move. In order to make the piston move and get some work done, something has to change. Start a fire above the engine and place a block of ice below it. Now the pressure above the piston will increase and the pressure below the piston will decrease so it can move. Only when the engine communicates with two different kinds of things can it actually accomplish anything. This is true of many things in life. But men have trouble with the idea of balancing between two things. Since the first time they discovered the spear and the stone ax to aid in their wars on nature, they’ve gotten used to having things imbalanced in their favor. Imagine the woman is the cylinder of the engine and the man’s overwhelming attention to her is the uniform, enveloping pressure which immobilizes her. Next, imagine that man is gracious enough to relinquish the woman from his attention and focus it on something else:  his Tribe, his Society, his Life’s Purpose—this might cause her heart to free and for her to feel attraction for him. In doing this, the man will understand what real love is. In focusing all his attention on the woman, the man can’t love the woman and at bottom, she knows this. To truly love a woman, he must also care for her by creating a life for them within society. To truly love her at all, he must balance between his love for her and his love for his Life’s Purpose. This is confusing for him, because love is something that has come from nature and therefore is born of balance. War and Motion—Man’s nature—are inherently imbalanced and, so, Man must always struggle to understand love while it comes perfectly natural to women.

6. The Nature of Female Desire

Freud is famous for having said that despite all his investigations he still hadn’t been able to determine what a woman wants.

What we will endeavor to establish is what a woman wants and more precisely I take this phrase to refer to the information that a woman uses to select a mate. It’s also the information she continues to use to determine whether or not to retain her mate selection.

Before beginning, it’s illustrative to start with what people would naturally assume as a first guess and use this as a point of departure. Our childhood assumptions of what a woman wants may follow these assumptions, 1: that this information is wholly inside of her, (internal), 2: that she is conscious of this information, (accessible), 3: that this information is given to her at birth and not subject to change, (permanent).

The difficulty with past theories has been one of perspective. The question itself, ‘What does a woman want’ is flawed and rather we should ask ‘what do women want?’ As Jung has said in Man and his Symbols the idea of the individual is fairly new in human history. Ancient tribes understood themselves to be more strongly connected with nature itself. From these ideas and his study of various societies, Jung developed his theory of the Collective Unconscious. This theory expresses how different peoples throughout the world can have similar universal themes surface across various cultures. The theory of the Collective Unconscious states that groups of people separated by both continent and epoch can have similar thoughts deriving from the evolutionary similarities of their brains. These different groups have thoughts in a manner similar to how an individual can have thoughts and these groups can remain largely unaware of these collective thoughts. Now, if the collective unconscious exists, what is its purpose? The individual unconscious secretly networks between the various elements of the mind to guide the individual. By extension, the collective unconscious, likely, networks in secret between individuals to guide the group.

By way of comparing Freud with Jung the question arises:  If the Collective Unconscious exists, does it have a collective id? The id, as noted before, is a critical component of Freud’s philosophy and, for the individual, is known to be the home of the libido which is known to be the impetus of action for a human being. Freud further states that the unconscious is relatively large and influential in comparison to the conscious and that the sexual drives of the individual largely dominate that individual’s behavior. Can these assertions be extrapolated onto the collective id? Does the collective id even exist? What proof do we have of a number of people using their minds to make a representation of a collective mind? We have the internet. And, if we examine the internet, do we find a majority of sites concerning serious, utilitarian things and a minority of pages concerning sexual matters? No. We do not. We find the opposite. Just as the individual mind is composed of a relatively small, conscious section concerned with utilitarian matters and a vast, submerged portion concerning sexual drives so too does our electronic, networked system of minds mimic this tendency. As such, the internet is presented as evidence of the existence of a collective id. And it is the collective id, not the individual id that holds the secret of what a woman wants. It follows that both the collective groups of men and women should have their own collective ids.

By this argument, I have begun to suggest that perhaps the truest influence of a woman’s desires is not internal but rather external. The next question that arises is:  are these critical desires accessible or inaccessible in her mind. The answer of these two questions can have serious consequences towards one’s outlook on women and life in general. Consider a young, hapless man that is not especially skilled with the ladies. Eventually, he obtains an audience with a beautiful woman of his own age who is happily in a committed relationship. He asks the beautiful woman: “What do women want?” At this point we can already assume that this young man will not get the answer he seeks. Her answer, though said with confidence and enthusiasm will be incorrect to the point of deception. We can already guess that it might be something along the lines of “Be yourself” or “I like a guy that can make me laugh.” Why does she say these things? Being yourself can be somewhat important and a sense of humor can help in some instances but these are the flourishes of attraction, not the foundation. How can she not know this? If the answer of what she wanted existed inside her and she had access to it, then her response to this young man, seeing that her needs in this department were already met, would come off as cruel or perhaps unintelligent.

Let’s imagine that she did have access to this information. Would she want to tell his young man? I should hope not. This man has struggled his whole life to attract women—something of no small importance. He is existing in a state of scarcity. If she gives him this information, he may very well use it against her in the near future. But, perhaps she’s a trusting soul and she feels pity for the young man and therefore she tells him after being loosened up by a few beverages. The secret to her sexual attraction, she reveals, is X. In a matter of weeks she is bedded by not only this loser but all the other losers of the village. How long do you think a woman like this would be able to keep her genes in the gene pool?

For this reason, it’s most likely that women have evolved to compartmentalize their most critical sexual desires within their unconscious minds such that they are inaccessible to them and, more importantly, to men.

Now, the hapless young man may say, “Well, if she doesn’t know, then I’ll just observe her until I discover her secret!” If this were possible someone would have figured it out, written it down and we could all agree:  yes, this is correct. But still, he accompanies her at restaurant A, and she seems attracted to behavior B, her accompanies her to nightclub C, and she seems attracted to behavior D, he joins her at cocktail party E, and she seems allured by behavior F. Exasperated and depressed, he gives up. He has failed to realize that his problem was one of perspective. In this instance, he viewed her desire as inaccessible to her, yet still individual and permanent. To understand why this is a faulty combination of assumptions, let’s contrast the critical sexual desire of a man with that of a woman. A man’s critical sexual desire can be expressed by this question:  Which of these women is most likely to provide me with healthy offspring, live through childbirth and remain capable to raise the children? This information is physical and therefore not subjective. It cannot be kept a secret from other men.

The critical questions for a woman are:  Which of these men is most likely to be a loyal mate; succeed among fellow men to provide for my offspring; improve our chances of surviving in this environment; and pass on genes that will aid in our community’s survivability? The answers to these questions are highly subtle and subjective. They can be hidden easily. It’s to the woman’s advantage to conceal the information she’s been compiling since birth on this subject. It’s also to her advantage to cooperate and pool information among women to a limited extent. Therefore, the question of selecting a man as a mate has proven too complex and too important to be solved by the mind of a single woman. Instead, women leverage what’s known among computer programmers and biologists as distributed intelligence. Why should a woman be content with the data residing in only her own mind for such an important question when she can go to a party and through the observation of other woman’s nonverbal cues (a reddening of the lips, a dilation of the pupils, a twirling of the hair, the structure of a conversation as opposed to the content) she can determine which men are attracting which women at a given instant in time. And by exchanging nonverbal and indirect information, these women can gain the advantage of compiling critical information regarding desirability in very large groups and still not risk corrupting their findings through leaks of this insider information to the men in question.

7. The Directing of Female Desire

Now one can see the futility of trying to view a woman’s critical desire as, 1: internal, 2: accessible and, 3: permanent. Rather, owing to evolutionary and social pressures it is much more likely to be, 1: external, 2: inaccessible and, 3:  subject to constant change or changing. Many know from experience that it’s extremely difficult to understand and please one woman over a long period of time. On the contrary, whether in a committed relationship or not, pleasing groups of women at various instances throughout one’s life may be a much more viable option. And when we examine the underpinnings of female desire (external, inaccessible and changing) we see that women are most interested in a man’s effectiveness in a given environment. How can a man use this information to his advantage?

Just as the women must use discretion, so too must a man. It’s to the man’s advantage to leverage the subconscious power of the group as opposed to the conscious attention of an individual woman. Subconscious signals are much harder to fake and can affect groups of women without their awareness, giving the man the advantage of surprise. Subconscious male signals of excellence are characterized by subtle refinement in things like voice tone, posture, calm, openness and dress. These signals are secondary to the one, big signal. To imagine the biggest subconscious signal that can attract a group of women one must ask oneself:

What is a signal?

It’s a way of propagating information. And what’s the best way to propagate information? Should one utilize only the women of the group or should one attempt to utilize both women and men? Should one seek attention and praise or should one attempt to be selfless? What’s the best way to get large groups of both men and women talking about you in a positive way when you’re not around?


But not just any altruism. If someone directs you to perform an altruistic deed that deed will likely be attributed to whoever commanded you. The altruistic deed must also be a demonstration of your internal locus of control, of your leadership ability to care for a group. The altruistic deed need not be grand but it should be successful. Why are altruistic deeds so effective as opposed to win-win political deals? Altruistic deeds are unique in that they can’t be traced back to an individual’s needs. Altruistic deeds focus entirely on the betterment of the group and, as described earlier, the betterment of the group is the main focus of networked, female desire.

This point deserves to be belabored a moment. Imagine two men, A and B, perform some feat at a party. Man A does a really cool trick. After he leaves, all the women gush over the impressiveness of the trick. However, since the men stand to gain nothing by admiring the man’s trick (and risk taking the spotlight off themselves) they become critical of man A. Man B performs a service that sincerely benefits everyone at the party and further Man B is able to play it cool enough so that no one suspects he has done anything for attention. Now, after he leaves, his male rivals are conflicted over criticizing someone who has benefited them and busy contemplating the benefit they’ve just received.

And so it follows that the best way to demonstrate effectiveness in a given environment and thereby redirect networked female desire is to serve. Descartes may have said:  I think, therefore, I am. In this instance it’s more appropriately said:  “I serve, therefore, I attract.”


1. Life is Nonlinear; Life is Non-Fair

One of the highest services a man can provide is to give his alliances an unfair advantage over their competitors. This raises the question:  What does it mean for an advantage to be unfair? The answer lies in the exploration of what it means to be a sensual human being experiencing the world. The senses can be broken down into two categories which we will denote as proportional and trans-proportional. The first four senses of touch, taste, smell and sound are all capable of processing vast and varied quantities of information. They can even provide the illusion of experiencing multiple things at once. We’ve all listened to a song on the radio and had the experience of listening to vocals and various instruments all at the same time. And yet only one impulse of sound is coming out of the speakers per unit time from one propagating sound wave. In this case the mind provides the experience of simultaneity while the environment submits one piece of information per unit time. Granted, with regard to simultaneity, tastes and smells can provide simultaneous experiences through the differing sense receptors in the nose and mouth although the individual is rarely aware of this and lumps it together as one experience in the conscious mind.

Therefore, each piece of information from these four senses can vary effectively only in their proportions. Touches are proportional to the pressure from outside forces; scents are proportional to the quantity of certain molecules; sounds to the displacement of air waves and tastes to the presence of chemical compounds. The thing that constrains each of these senses to mere proportionality is that each is decidedly serial in nature. Just like the serial ports on a computer, they each process a singular piece of information per unit time. The obvious limitation being that at any given time these senses must superimpose bits of incoming information instead of being able to make comparisons between them. For example, multiple hands touching a body at one time, various scents in the air and simultaneous sounds all become confused or united in the mind and yield little additional information for most of us.

In mathematics we would call all these bits of information linear. They only have one aspect of variation that can only be adjusted in a directly proportional manner.

2. The Rationale behind Visualization

There is one of our five senses which can go beyond these limitations. The sense of sight and, by extension, the mind’s eye is capable of processing a vast amount of fully-differentiated, electromagnetic information simultaneously. It’s a parallel processor. As will be shown, the mind/eye system allows us to see what we refer to colloquially in the world as fairness or unfairness.

When we think of fairness, we oftentimes refer to people as being straight or on-the-level. The man that worked a proportional amount of hours should receive a proportional amount of pay; the man with a proportional amount of prestige should receive proportional quality in a significant other; the city of a certain population should have a proportional amount of employment opportunities. These are all things we instinctively feel should be true. Unfortunately, as many of us have experienced, life is not always fair or proportional. And the sense of sight provides us with the capability to parallel process the necessary information in our mind in order to understand both the proportional and disproportional aspects of life.

The human eye is able to, for example, look at numerous bits of information such as black dots on a piece of paper. It can see all those dots simultaneously and, in some instances, it has the flexibility to comprehend that an imaginary line made to pass through all those dots would not be straight but rather curved or disproportional.

Physicists and other scientists continue to discover more and more real world systems each year which exhibit predominately disproportional behavior. Therefore, the world can be said to be characterized predominately by disproportional systems or, more colloquially, by a lack of fairness. This fact can be greatly advantageous to those who accept it and disastrous to those who do not. Nature is unfair; weather systems are unfair; economic systems are unfair; all things in life which we desire most dearly are unfair. A man who goes fishing for two hours does not automatically receive two hours worth of fish; a man who moves to California for two years does not receive two years worth of Californian earthquakes; a man who talks to a woman for two hours does not receive two hours worth of admiration. The secrets of all these systems lie in the disproportionally that exist between their elements. This is why imagination and visualization are so critical to Man’s future success. This is why the famous director, the victorious general and the esteemed statesman are all called visionaries.

Many people are no doubt frustrated with the platitude of ‘use positive visualization to achieve success.’ Visualization is the hallmark of greatness, however, in athleticism, business, art, technology and politics. And yet mankind is not the end-all-be-all of intellectual development. Mankind is one of an infinite number of evolutionarily-honed cognitive dead-ends within a vast universe of time and space. There are aspects of life we have a great difficulty to understand because they lay at or just beyond our cognitive abilities. Some aspects of visualization fall within this category and so the guidelines of visualization that follow have been designed to challenge the reader in an effort to fully describe this phenomenon:

1. Visualize everyone you intend to help

The first step to better visualization is to consider it as a map with a destination described upon it. Many people just visualize themselves with the material possessions they want. This can be a decent start because it forces the mind to quantify the success necessary to acquire those things. A much richer map will include all the people one intends to help. Including those intended to benefit from the journey described on the map leaves one better suited to cater to those they must help in order to achieve their goals.

2. Visualization is an organizational system

In order to better understand the people visualized, it’s important to understand that visualization in general is an organizational system. It first allows us to imagine objects or people. Once imagined, we can further enrich our maps through the addition of the other four senses. We can imagine going inside the bodies of the people we have visualized and feeling what they will feel when they come in contact with our message, product or service.

3. Use the Carrot and the Stick

In art as well as in all mediums of information transfer, synergistic information comes from heightened contrast. Spend time visualizing both the desired outcome as well as the undesired. This dual strategy will provide more valuable insights than using either alone.

4. Quality in/ Quality Out

Quality visualizations capable of helping one reach their goals are not likely to materialize from thin air. Spend time studying the world around you to provide the feedstock for future successful visualizations. This study can be online, in books or face-t0-face. Pay particular attention to modeling The Victor, The Failure and The Customer. These three perspectives can provide the necessary scope of information to give synergistic insights.

5. Appreciate the Disproportional Aspects of Nature

The wooded areas of nature are among the most abundant sources of disproportional information available. To really supercharge creativity and prepare one for future visualizations (perhaps while dreaming) go for a run in the woods and look up at the contours of tree branches. Then, before tiring, slow down to a walk and stare at the ground. This contrast of visions and physiological states will help to maximize the amount of information for retrieval from nature.

6. Use Visualization as a Map to Your Inner Resources

Sometimes the best benefit of visualization is that it helps us remember and make connections between things we already know.

7. Use Certainty to Get out of a Rut

(described below)

It’s a common practice in visualization techniques to attempt to trick oneself into pretending a goal has already been achieved. This technique has been previously explained elsewhere as an exploitation of the mind’s inability to interpret between a goal achieved and a goal fully imagined. A more complete, helpful explanation may be as follows:  The subconscious mind is largely controlling and limiting our daily behaviors based on very ancient rules which it feels are in our best interest. This process of subconscious control is described in the theory of Dynamic Homeostasis in which both lower and higher organisms seek to maintain certain behaviors in order to maintain a comfort level with the familiar. Women, for example, may continually seek out abusive spouses after being beaten by a father because this pattern of existence is all they know. In many cases the subconscious mind does not like to explore new territory because this is seen as an unnecessary risk to the organism. Full, rich visualization offers a chance to sidestep this limiting mechanism. If the subconscious mind is consistently offered visualizations nearing the clarity and quality of memory, it may cease to view the fulfillment of those visualizations as an unnecessary risk and begin taking subconscious steps toward them.

The nature of how we near our goals is very curious and worthy of further consideration. The exact nature of how this is accomplished seems to push one to the edge of the power of reason. In the Socratic dialogue Parmenides, logic is used to determine that space and time are illusions and that all objects and persons belong to an undifferentiated Unity. This troubling tract of logical thought was obtained thousands of years ago and has been repeated in various cultures throughout known history. The basic idea is that the extent of space and time are necessarily infinite. Space and time must both be without a definite extent in order for us to exist at all. If space and time are without extent, then how can any measure of extension be justified? If extent cannot be justified, then how can separation be justified? Once these divisions and extents are deemed implausible, universal unity is the only remaining option.

If separation and space are illusions, than the simplest, most elegant representation of the universe is a single, infinitesimal spec in which everything that exists is coincident and indivisible. (Notice the strange congruity between this and the currently held belief of the initial conditions of the Big Bang Theory. Has all creation been an illusion?) And how can logic exist in this state where there is no separation of time, space or bodies? In this view of reality, logic becomes meaningless and we are left with only the single rule of the Law of Attraction. This commonly held belief states that whatever we think about, we attract to us. Instead of using logic to obtain the illusion of attraction, it can be said we use the Law of Attraction to obtain the illusion of logic.

One might ask at this point: Why is this New-Age stuff being proposed? It’s being proposed because flexibility is an important aspect of manhood. Being able to hold contradicting, unresolved ideas simultaneously in one’s mind is paramount to leadership. And further:

The identification with one’s goals made possible through the Law of Attraction is the foundation of a man’s instinct to hunt. What better way is there to achieve your goals than to identify with them? Be it an animal hunted for food, a relationship sought out or a customer tempted to make a purchase, the more one can identify with the minds associated with one’s goals, the more one can understand and anticipate their movements.

There may be two simultaneously valid views of existence: The internal view of absolute unity in space and time and the external view of perceived separation and disproportion.

3. Disproportional Barriers

Let’s look at the nature of the disproportional barriers that can limit or enable success. Most of us, from our sheltered experiences in childhood, school and work, tend to expect proportional rewards for proportional efforts. In technical industries, sales personnel often earn higher salaries than their coworkers in engineering. This is because the sales personnel have been forced to face the worldly reality that at least eight prospective clients out of ten will say no. This is known as the eighty/twenty rule. Scientists and inventors also encounter this rule. It’s curious to wonder what people might have said behind the backs of the Wright Brothers just before their first flight at Kitty Hawk or at Menlo Park when Edison was on his ninety-fifth filament or in Ray Bradbury’s hometown as he was writing his 999,999th word of unpublishable prose. It’s important to note that none of these men received gradual evidence of improvement as they progressed. There was only their internal vision with its potential that served as a driving force to maintain their efforts. And when their efforts panned out, each time the success was sharp and drastic. It was a breaking point phenomenon like the quantum states of electrons, the flipping of an electric switch or the loosening of a stubborn jar’s lid.

Still there must be some predictable way to achieve the attainment of a disproportional result. Let’s consider an example. Suppose someone is opening a new hardware store in a large city. They go out and cover the streets with fliers for different products available in the store. Each of these fliers is made a little different with the intent of casting a wide net and appealing to a broad audience. Unfortunately, it rains soon after the fliers were put out. There were only a couple days for potential customers to notice the fliers and the inconsistency of their design prohibited everyone from making the connection that they all came from the same store. Next, through a zoning loophole, the owner was able to create a grouping of permanent signs throughout the city. Each of these signs was made from the same template with the same logo and slogan. And, on opening day, some of the overflow of customers had to be turned away. This second example shows a few rules-of-thumb for the attainment of a disproportional result. The store owner’s second efforts were, 1: connected, 2: permanent and 3: culminating.

The concept of a disproportional result exists not only in achievement but also in discipline (such as the attainment of enlightenment in transcendental meditation) and persuasion (such as the winning of a presidential campaign). The subject that we’ve been nearing for the past several paragraphs is the personal success implications of the mathematical theory of Chaos. In Chaos Theory, infinitesimally small changes in the starting conditions of a system are known to create drastic downstream effects—(also known as the Butterfly Effect). Archimedes once said, “Give me a lever long enough and I can move the world.” The persuasion corollary to this is, “Make a good impression early on enough and you can persuade the world.”

Now, through the lens of Chaos Theory we are ready to fully understand how to overcome disproportional obstacles in the world at large. Already it has been proposed that these efforts must be 1: connected, 2: permanent and 3: culminating. Imagine two systems in opposition. System A is acting and system B is reacting. System B employs a singular defense mechanism to oppose system A’s actions. From the literature of Chaos Theory we can clearly see that the two most important aspects controlling the success of system A are 1: the initial conditions of system A’s campaign of actions and 2: the defeat of the defense mechanism of system B. In the example of the hardware store owner, the favorable initial conditions were the unification of their design logo along with their permanent installation. This allowed the results of the signage to gradually build in the customer’s minds. The defense mechanism in this case is the reluctance of the customers to shop someplace new. Once this reluctance is overcome, the customers have no further preconceived defense. They are essentially defenseless and in free-fall toward the hardware store owner’s original intent. Once a reacting system’s defense mechanism is defeated, there is a marked improvement in the success of the acting system since the reacting system had been relying exclusively on one defense mechanism. This is how the disproportional results that some may choose to view as unfair are obtained.

4. Conclusion

The real world can be unfair and disproportional but, throughout history, Mankind has sought to create proportionality to please the proportional nature of our senses. We have done this through Agriculture and through Industry. These agents have brought us closer and closer to a life where predictable efforts can receive predictable rewards. But the predictability of life has cut us off from the reality, the beauty, the risk and the fullness of life. A life’s purpose is the pursuit of an undiscovered, disproportional (or unfair) result out in the world at large.

The world at large, however, has been conditioned to see and expect a proportional (or fair) reality. Take this maxim chanted with regularity at every office in the English-speaking world:  “The definition of insanity is to do the same thing and expect a different result.” Is this well said? In some instances, perhaps yes. Yet consider this, 1: the physical world is far too complex to predict, 2: the majority of our actions fall beneath the detection of the majority of our senses.

In the things that matter to us most, it’s difficult or near impossible for us to detect with certainty whether or not we are indeed doing the exact same task over and over again. In these instances, owing to the inferior nature of our senses and the grandness of the outcome desired, we may be better served to repeat ourselves.

In a salaried or wage environment, the maxim of the ‘insanity of repetition’ does hold true since these environments were designed to elicit linear results from linear efforts, i.e. I pay you this much and you do this much. When a man works for himself, he must ignore this maxim. He must remember that he is seeking great rewards for great efforts.


Kahn, Michael, Basic Freud: Psychoanalytic Thought for the 21st Century. New York: Perseus Books Group, 2002.

Freud, Sigmund, Civilization and Its Discontents. New York: W.W. Norton and Company, Inc., 1961.

Jung, Carl, Man and His Symbols. New York: Random House, 1964.

Dawkins, Richard, The Selfish Gene. New York:  Oxford University Press, 1976.

Moran, Michael, J. & Shapiro, Howard, N., Fundamentals of Engineering Thermodynamics. Austin, Texas:  John Wiley & Sons Inc., 2000.

About davidwallacefleming

David Wallace Fleming is a U.S. writer, living in Austin, Texas. He is the author of the coming-of-age, social media novel GROWING UP WIRED, and the satirical science fiction audiobook, NOT FROM CONCENTRATE.
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One Response to Modern Manhood – A Four-Part Essay

  1. Mason says:

    The author discussed an amazing array of topics
    of evolving manhood. Complex ideas re explored
    causing both female and male readers to ponder
    how best to pursue life and relationships. Quite

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